Come on! Paddle Padddle Paddle Paddle Paddle

September 1, 2008

So armed with a devil-may-care attitude, we headed off on the kayak for a trip up the Boyne River. Yes, we know that the standard way to kayak is to drive it up stream and kayak down stream. But, we could hardly portage the kayak via bicycles all the way up to Dam Road (a couple people mentioned this so we assume this is the "typical" starting point for kayaking down the Boyne River). Undaunted, we headed upstream.

The first obstacle was the culverts under the street. Phil was worried that they weren't wide enough and that we'd get the paddles stuck crossway in the culvert, thus getting ourselves stuck, no one would hear our cries for help, and everyone would wonder why that nice couple just abandoned that beautiful boat at the Boyne City Marina.

Bernie's fear was that spiders, lurking in the culvert would fall on us midway through and the ensuing commotion would cause us to capsize. Since we would be in the middle of the culvert, no one would see us or hear our cries for help, and everyone would wonder why that nice couple just abandoned that beautiful boat at the Boyne City Marina.

But it went smoothly and we were confident we could handle the river since the rapids had been removed (unless the marina people meant it was the dam that was removed).

OK. So the rapids weren't quite removed. But the dam was. And these rapids, while bigger than what we dealt with at Long Point Cove, weren't too bad. All it took was focus. We backed up a little and then paddled really hard and went right up and over them.

That's when we saw the next set of Mighty Rapids. Roiling, bubbling, churning, and swirling. Around a lot of rocks. Right between us and the smooth glassy water of the Boyne River that we wanted to get to. But our confidence had been built by successfully sailing through the culvert and the first set of rapids, so we attacked.

And were humbled. Grandly so.

Undaunted we tried again. This time sneaking up from the right side so as to catch the Mighty Rapids unaware. This time we were only pushed back 30 feet.

Again!

With Phil advising Bernie to "Paddle like the wind" we raced at the Mighty Rapids. Hey we made progress, only getting pushed back 15 feet this time. The Mighty Rapids are obviously tiring down and we'll be able to get through.

Again!

This time in order to maintain our focus, Bernie yelled our battle cry

Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!
Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!
Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!

And it worked. Instead of getting pushed back we got wedged in sideways in the rocks in the middle of the Mighty Rapids. Hmmm. This is quite a predicament. This time though, if the roiling water capsized us, we'd at least be seen by all those people eating dinner on the outdoor patio of a restaurant over looking the river. Presuming, of course, that they weren't rolling on the floor laughing their @** es off at the dunces in the kayak trying to get up the Mighty Rapids.

Somehow we freed ourselves - it involved Bernie crawling into the nose of the kayak so Phil could move his seat as far forward as possible to lighten up the back end. Just another amusing skit for the nice people eating dinner.

One more time!

Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!
Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!
Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!

Back to being pushed down the river. OK. Time to do some field research. We tied the kayak to shore and scrambled up the bank to look over the bridge to see if there was a path down on the other side that we could portage the kayak to and launch beyond the Mighty Rapids. No such luck. About this time we saw a group of kayakers gently floating down the river. Down the river. The way we know you're supposed to go. Anyway, we asked them if they'd noticed a nearby place to launch the kayak from the other side of the bridge.

They hadn't. Not willing to give up, we tried one last thing. We walked the kayak to the corner of the shore and the bridge, under which the Mighty Rapids flowed. We used the paddles to anchor/push our way through the rapids.

Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!
Push! Push! Push! Push! Push!
Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!
Push! Push! Push! Push! Push!

By this time the roar of laughter from the outdoor diners was louder than the roar of the Mighty Rapids.

But we made it through the Mighty Rapids! Well at least Bernie, in the front of the kayak made it through. She was so relieved to be through the Mighty Rapids that she stopped to raise her hands in triumph. Then, from behind, she heard

Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!

OOPS! Phil's end of the kayak hadn't quite made it through the Mighty Rapids yet, and he was paddling like a maniac trying to keep us from getting pushed back AGAIN, while "gently" reminding Bernie to continue paddling. Sheesh! What has he been doing back there? Napping? No wonder we couldn't get through the first six times!

So the paddling was on again and this time we BOTH made it through the Mighty Rapids. And when we get back, we're going to take one of those REI kayak classes so we can learn how to do this without creating a comedy show for outdoor diners.

It was a very scenic trip up the river. The river twists and turns and its bank has interesting tree and plant configurations. We saw a number of different water birds including snow geese and a green heron.


The trip back down the river was incredibly easy. A few paddle strokes here and there to keep the kayak straight was all that was required. That was good because we were a bit tired from all that Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle! Paddle!

We got back in time for one of Boyne City's pretty sunsets.